Hello, friends.
This is Monika, coming to you live from Living India News Channel.
As you can see, we are in a beautiful village of Punjab.
Like Southall in UK is considered Mini Punjab,
this village in Punjab is known as Mini America,
because two-thirds of the population of this village has settled abroad.
You must be proud of your Punjab.
The clean roads,
the palatial houses filled with imported stuff.
And imported cars.
But there's something really special about this village.
The only people you'll see here are senior citizens.
This is what he gave me.
He said I should ping him whenever I wish to talk to him.
Someone tell him...
when I can't even use a phone properly, how will I use a computer?
Oh, my dear son...
This is the witch!
I don't know what sort of spell she's cast on my son.
It has been five years.
Neither has he visited, nor has he let me see my grandsons.
That witch has given my grandsons such weird names.
Cha Singh, Shoo Singh.
What kind of names are these?
We have seen the whole village.
Now let's talk to men sitting here.
-Uncle? -Yes.
I have toured the whole village.
I didn't see a single young man.
-Can I ask something? -Go ahead.
Is there any young man left in this village?
There is, dear.
There is one young man.
Really?
Mann's son. Major German Singh Mann.
So he has a high post in army!
What!
Good morning, sir.
My name is Major German Singh Mann.
I just want to go to England for 10-15 days as a tourist.
I have a very big business of agriculture in India.
So I have to come back quickly.
German, don't ruin it with over practicing.
Here's your file. It's time for the interview.
I think you didn't hear it, daddy.
My name is Major German Singh Mann.
So I have to come back...
Oh my!
My son speaks in English so well!
Bless me!
My name is Major German Singh Mann.
I just want to go to England for 10-15 days as a tourist.
Very big business in India.
Myself Major German...
My name is Major German Singh Mann.
I just want to England for 10-15 days.
I have a very big business in England.
Not England, Major! What's this nonsense!
This won't help you.
I have a very big business in India.
It is so difficult to lie.
My name is Major German Singh Mann.
I just want to go to England for 10-15 days as a tourist.
I have a very big business in India.
My name is Shahid Khan and I am not a terrorist.
-I am a government teacher. -Very good.
-I am working... -Very good, Mr. Khan.
Be confident. Don't be scared of anything.
Talk with confidence. You're good at speaking in English.
My name is Shahid Khan and I am not a terrorist.
I understood.
-I am a government employee. -Very good. Speak in English.
-I teach English. -Stick to English. That's it. Very good.
My name is Shahid Khan. I am not a terrorist.
As you wish. Don't mess up.
My name is Mann Major...
My name is Shahid Khan. I am not a terrorist.
I'm not a terrorist...
I'm a government employee, and...
I'm not a terrorist...
-Major German Singh Mann? -Yes, sir!
Good morning, sir.
My name is Major German Singh Mann.
I just want to go to England for 10-15 days as a terrorist.
I have very big business of agriculture in India.
So I have to come back quickly.
Quickly.
Terrorism is your purpose of going to England?
Yes, sir.
So what if you didn't get the visa?
We still aren't out of countries or money.
We will try some other place.
Only his visa application was rejected.
Soon it'll be marriage proposals too.
He might just end up with nothing to his name.
Stop blabbering.
Tega has gone to England when he was 26.
He got married when he was 28.
My son got late because he was studying.
You need to have some change in the pocket to get the visa.
You cannot make money without having some money of your own.
Aunt, I am starving. Please serve me dinner.
Sister-in-law, you shouldn't be so proud of your money.
My son too will go abroad.
Otherwise, change my name.
Why are you getting upset, brother?
She has a habit of joking.
I am not joking.
I suggest that you find a nice girl and get him married.
I cannot cook for everyone every day.
I'm tired of this.
Okay, then!
You just wait and watch, sister-in-law.
I'll have the most beautiful daughter-in-law in the village.
German, get up!
Let's go!
Brother!
Good morning, sir.
My name is Major German Singh Mann.
I just want to go to England for 10-15 days as a tourist.
I have a very big business in India. Yes.
-My name is Shahid Khan, -My name is...
I am not a terrorist.
My name is Shahid Khan and I am not a terrorist.
Shahid Khan!
You didn't get the visa?
But you're so good at English.
Let me tell you the real reason.
These Englishmen don't like us.
It's not how we speak.
I am very good at English.
My name is Shahid Khan and I am not a terrorist.
Not a terrorist.
I am not a terrorist.
-I am not a terrorist! -Yeah, yeah.
My name is Major German Singh Mann.
I just want to go to England for 10-15 days as a terrorist.
Yes. Very big business in India.
Idiot, not terrorist, it's tourist.
Tourist. Terrorists kill people!
My name is Shahid Khan and I am not a terrorist.
My name is Major German Singh Mann.
I just want to go to England for 10-15 days as a terrorist.
Damn you, Shahid Khan! You got my visa rejected!
Good morning, sir!
What?
Well done, Major.
You hit a jackpot this time.
An Indian girl as your visa officer.
What's your name, dear?
My name is Sonia Khanna, I am your visa officer.
Hey, you are a Punjabi! Forget that, you are a relative!
My aunt, Baljeet?
She is married to a Khanna.
They live in the Cable lane.
Where do you stay in Khanna?
I am from Delhi. Khanna is my surname.
Delhi isn't far away either.
If there is no traffic, it's just seven hours away, give or take.
Can I see your documents?
Don't tire yourself.
I'll come over there and give them to you.
Stay there.
Your name is quite interesting.
It is not interesting. It is troublesome.
While filling forms, I run out of space before my name ends.
You know what happened?
My grandfather wanted me to join the Army.
And my father wanted to send me to Germany.
And Mann is our caste.
I have taken four interviews till now.
All four of them made fake documents to get a visa.
But I am pleased to meet an honest person like you.
Let's begin the interview.
Introduction please.
Okay, madam.
Good morning, sir.
Good morning, madam.
My name is Major German Singh Mann.
I just want to go to England for 10-15 days as a tourist.
I have a very big business in India.
I have to come back...
Look Sonia, honestly speaking, if you give me the visa,
I won't be coming back from England.
Really?
But I can only give you a 15-day visa.
What will I do with a 15-day visa?
Look, the flight itself is eight hours.
It takes around two hours to get out of the airport, including toilet breaks, etc.
So in total I need a 12-hour visa.
I won't come back.
Then what about your 100 acres of land?
I added an extra zero.
I have only 10 acres.
10 acres is a lot.
You can get a car as dowry.
But I don't approve of dowry and all.
I want to go abroad. Please give me the visa.
It was a pleasure to meet you.
Thank you. Thank you so much.
Sonia, just because I am going abroad,
doesn't mean that our story ends here.
You can write your address and your phone number
on the last page of the file.
I promise I will call once I go abroad.
I always keep my promises.
That is true.
Mrs. Darshan Kaur.
She isn't with me.
My father has come with me.
He is waiting downstairs.
Did I get the visa?
You gave it to me so quickly.
This is the benefit of being a Punjabi.
He is trying for England.
It would be great if he pulls through.
Father, come with me.
Shall I book the tickets?
Yes, to go back to the village.
I'd be stupid to think about going abroad again.
Brother, I have to go abroad at any cost.
Let's try once again.
You have no hope left.
Boota...
No, you won't get it.
-Boota... -It's impossible. Go away.
You won't get it.
But... listen to me.
Boota, why don't send him to Germany?
Uncle, his visa application for Germany has already been rejected thrice.
I think this time embassy will stamp abuses on his passport.
Will that be fine?
Boota, do they also make them take a truth serum before the interview?
Uncle, they don't interrogate for murder in there.
He has a bad habit of telling the truth.
Tell me something.
Why doesn't he just say what's written in the file?
Son, it will be a huge favor.
Do something about him.
Otherwise, her aunt will laugh at both of us.
Sir, people laugh at me.
My reputation has been ruined,
by you and your son.
Help me, brother.
I swear, I won't tell the truth.
I will lie so much that crime shows will make a feature on me.
Okay then.
It will cost you 350,000 rupees.
Okay, sir?
Your job will be done.
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Hey!
What is this nonsense!
You should have come in a car or something.
Nowadays even eunuchs come in cars.
Take my reputation into consideration.
I come here quite often.
Listen up, brother.
This truck is very lucky for us.
And listen...
don't underestimate me.
I have done four tours in Malaysia.
Oh, you damned fool...
What's so great about performing in Malaysia?
You guys are worse than me.
Stubborn monkeys.
Let's go.
Hey!
Major?
Let me talk to them, okay?
I will do all the talking.
You just sit with your mouth sealed.
Or don't sit.
I'll still do all the talking.
Class stand.
This isn't a classroom.
Respect, sir. Sorry.
We will first interview you.
Then if Mr. Wilson wants, we'll also test your music skills.
Let's take the interview.
Sorry, sir. First time.
Since how long you know each other?
Mr. Wilson wants to know when did you guys meet?
We just meet outside, in the parking.
He means today we met in the parking.
We have known each other since the past 10-15 years.
Yes.
Since 10 years.
How many shows you have in England?
Four.
He says four, you say two.
You didn't look at this.
Okay!
Four.
Four, four, four.
Just take this man away.
Whatever I will ask him, you ask him the same question.
You please come this way.
How much are you paid for this tour?
How much are you being paid for this trip?
-3,000. -300,000.
He said 300,000 per show.
This is bad.
He pays us only 3,000.
Get this crap out of here.
Drag them out.
Hit him! Hit him!
You ruined it for us!
We got a chance to perform in England with great difficulty.
They are hitting him.
Save him.
You need his help.
I'll pay a hit man to get rid of you.
You are a fraud.
Go! Come on.
Police is here!
Police! Police!
Police is here!
Run! Run!
Boota, please listen to me.
Listen to me! Get out of my office!
Otherwise, I'll hire goons to beat you up.
Listen son...
once my son boards the plane, you can take 800,000 from me.
Uncle, I don't want your 1.2 million.
Hey, what are you saying?
My father didn't say 1.2 million.
Shut up. I don't want to talk to you.
Uncle, you were talking about 1.2-1.4 million.
Okay, you can take 1.4 million.
But I like my respect more than money.
Okay then, 1.5 million.
No.
Listen Boota, 1.7 million, final! That's it.
-How much did you say? -1.7 million.
That's a bad deal, father.
Look at his face. Does he deserve to get 1.7 million?
Shut your mouth.
Aunty... oh, sorry uncle...
respect can be earned again.
One never knows when one gets a chance to make 1.7 million again.
How can German not go aboard when I am here?
Shame on me and my office!
Start making preparations.
Will it work?
It will.
Of course it will, Mr. Mann.
Do one thing. Lift your hand.
No, put that hand down. Yes.
This one like this.
Close your eyes.
When I say three, you use it.
-Use what? -The deadly weapon.
One, two, three.
A girl who is a citizen of England will come to India,
she'll fake marrying you and take you to England with her,
just like an eagle carrying a mouse in its claws.
This parcel from England is extra large.
That eagle will kill this mouse.
Let's go. Here's the board.
Where are we going?
Boota has asked me not to talk to you.
You should go and talk to him.
Who's Boota, the idiot?
I don't know any Boota.
Look, he might be an idiot but he's my brother.
I cannot say anything. You talk to him.
Wait.
My name isn't Geet. It's Komal.
With the heavy hand you have, your name should be King Kong.
Idiot.
Here we are. You're here to pick us up?
Why?
Are you my father's brother-in-law's son that I'll come to pick you up?
Move aside.
Why did you taking the longer route?
Couldn't you say 'uncle's son' instead?
You've come to pick me up?
If I had been so lucky, I'd have gone to Germany 3 years ago.
Idiot, then why are you holding a board with my name on it?
I am Geet.
Get my bags.
Listen to him talk!
Which one of them is your bag?
The red one.
My name is Lakkha Jhol.
Lakkha, meaning one in a million.
You don't know me.
I'm the one who decides your fate.
Idiot!
Who's this guy? How does it concern me? Let's go.
Oh, my God! She is so beautiful.
How did she agree to marry German?
Shut up.
God bless you, son.
-God bless. -God bless.
Congratulations, German.
Who's that?
The middleman.
This tiny one is the middleman?
Son, I hope you have decent clothes for the wedding.
We took 1.7 million from you.
But that doesn't mean that even old wrecks insult me.
He's the one who's paying you.
He doesn't look like he can even pay me 17 rupees.
And listen... this isn't our first wedding.
Okay, but it is my first wedding.
Come with me.
Here, brother. Have some sweets.
Congratulations.
Here. Have some sweets.
Make sure your blood sugar is in check.
Did you see the girl?
She is so beautiful.
I don't understand how she agreed to marry German?
You keep your mouth shut.
Everything has already been discussed,
but there is nothing like having a face-to-face conversation.
Tell me, I am listening.
You won't believe it, but I cannot lie.
It might be a fake wedding but my desires are real.
My aunt is about to get a heart attack.
And there is commotion in the village.
Just don't ask.
She doesn't need to. You're telling her anyway.
Well, I had come to give this money.
I have already given 500,000 to Boota.
And I have given you 300,000 earlier.
And here's another 300,000.
I'll give the rest once I go abroad.
Give it to me as soon as we reach England
or else I won't sign on the citizenship report.
Your height and your attitude match.
What do you mean?
Straightforward, like a stick.
Don't get beaten up by a stick.
The wedding's tomorrow, go dance or something.
Listen, brother...
I am ready to pay 2.7 instead of 1.7 million.
Can this fake wedding turned into a real one?
Cutting the cake and having it too?
Don't lose the cake because of your greed.
She is very hot-tempered.
What was he saying?
He said there is no commode in the bathroom.
I said it's not a big deal. We will manage.
Dust the sheets before you spread them.
Arrange the chairs.
Go keep the sofa in my room.
German!
Yes, father?
Son, what if our lie gets caught?
No, father. Don't worry.
I will turn this lie into the truth in a few days.
And your son likes your fake daughter-in-law.
God bless you.
Let's go see the girl.
-Yes. -There you go.
-Get down. -Major!
Yes, uncle?
All good?
Yes, uncle. All good!
Why are you here?
Hey!
Everyone in the village is talking about German's wedding.
I thought I should go an inquire.
I heard that you are getting married to a citizen of England?
I swear, I don't believe it.
Why?
Are you my wife's uncle that I need to convince you to get married?
And what do you mean by inquire?
Hey, this means it is true.
Bittoo, she is wearing hot pants.
Oh, she's so hot.
She agreed to marry German?
I swear, I don't believe it.
Sure, I didn't see anything!
Get this straight.
Before I thrash you in front of the entire village,
have some food and leave.
One more thing.
Don't eat the cheese fritters.
Have the cauliflower ones.
Cheese fritters are for my relatives.
Go.
Let's go, Bittoo.
Take him along.
Go.
German.
German, I was thinking, your family will be the bride's in-laws.
So you should send the girl to our place.
We'll be her maternal family and your family could be her in-laws.
Why are you in such a hurry, aunt?
We are getting married tomorrow.
We both will be there.
You can look at her every day.
No, I was just wonder, she came all by herself.
Where is her family?
We still haven't started serving lunch.
Do you know who I am?
Why should I know? Are you the bride's father?
-Yes, I am. -Get lost.
Hey, serve me some more fritters.
This is my daughter's in-law's house.
Where will I eat if not here?
What are you saying?
How can a girl get married without their parents?
-Come here! -Get this straight!
I will start protesting right here! Let me warn you.
-Get lost! -You rascal...
Come here.
Come here. Come here. Come here.
Boota, you better talk to the waiter.
Otherwise, I'll teach him a lesson.
Enough, try to understand.
Son, the girl is so beautiful.
Her face doesn't match with her father at all.
Yes, she has taken after her mother.
Look how beautiful she is.
As if her mother is Madhuri Dixit.
Their complexion is bad.
Sister, it is not easy to earn in pounds.
You have to lose your heart and your color.
Right?
Sister-in-law, what are you doing over here?
-Go and make tea for the guests. -Yes.
Where did you get these oldies from?
You should have brought some decent looking parents for her.
Mr. Mann, they are hard working decent people.
And he is also the head of the labor union.
I don't want him to sit for protests.
Look at his face. Does he look like my father-in-law?
He looks like Chris Gayle's father-in-law.
Boota, the father-in-law can be ignored.
But at least the mother-in-law should be decent looking.
-I'm leaving. -Wait!
Stop it, father. Don't interrupt.
What stop it? One has a right to joke after being two pegs down.
You can drink three and joke with me.
Leave them alone.
Son, we deserve to get rings as a wedding gift.
Don't make me stuff your mouth with a gold bangle.
Not the mouth, it's worn in the wrist.
This one's an idiot.
Ignore this greedy man, son.
But do pay us before we leave in the evening.
You will get your pay, aunt.
But keep two things in mind.
What?
You don't take any parcels while leaving.
And you will open your mouth only to eat.
Don't talk to anyone.
And listen, Boota.
Make sure they dress well.
-Understood? -Okay. Done.
-Take them away. -Okay.
-Let's go, father. -Don't talk so much. Let's go.
Geet...
I have a condition.
Oh, really?
You think you have the right to?
Lakkha!
What is it, Geet?
Did he say something? Yes?
He is putting conditions on me.
No, I said it by mistake thinking about the wedding.
I have a humble request.
Ask her to dress properly in the village.
Why? What's wrong with this?
No, but she can at least try to dress decently.
She is from England.
Not from some village.
Tomorrow you'll ask her to clean the floor.
The girls here dress like this only while playing badminton.
She'll get married in Indian attire, right?
I'll go to Patiala and get a few beautiful dresses for her.
Brother, aunty might end up insulting her.
Okay.
Now he is talking.
Okay, she'll wear Indian dresses.
But it will cost you another 25,000 daily.
Let's fix a lump sum. It will last only for 5-6 days.
Fine, give us a lump sum amount of 100,000.
I would like to praise you.
I have never seen a leech like you.
No problem.
Then good luck with her.
Fine, I will pay you.
Good.
Congratulations!
Congratulations to you too.
-Congratulations. -Thank you.
Congratulations, aunty.
Son, don't be too pleased.
She's charging us to marry you.
Your heart will break.
Father, she is worth it.
It's not a problem if I have to bear some more trouble because of her.
And they say, you have to die to visit heaven.
Geet, you are like family to me now.
Can I make a request?
Don't get too cozy.
It'll cost you.
Don't worry about the money.
I'll manage it.
Lakkha, please come here.
Yes?
He says he wants to spend some money.
Money will be spent like this.
Look at this.
Honestly speaking, I feel like puking when I see you.
Just like you feel
on the bus while traveling to Shimla.
Fine, then you take the bus to Shimla,
and I will get our plane ready and start packing.
How many bags do you have that you need time to pack?
You have one small red bag.
Five minutes, tops.
Fine, I'll be back in five minutes.
Lakkha, please listen to me.
God will bless you.
Tell her to be a little polite towards the villagers.
Otherwise, they will get suspicious.
Per day or lump sum?
Lump sum?
100,000.
Fine.
You can take from cash gifts.
Hand over the rest to me.
-Lakkha, you should start packing. -Yes.
-Father! -Yes!
Give me 1,00,000 rupees.
Why do you need it?
Meeting and greeting?
Congratulations, German.
This is for you.
And this is for your wife.
Oh, thank you.
Give it here.
Take this.
This is not fair.
Why are you crying, headman? Go have a shot at her!
Get lost! We don't like you. Go away.
What was this?
Meeting and greeting?
Give me the money back.
-Why? -Give it back.
50,000 is enough.
If she keeps greetings so freely, you will get loads of gifts.
Come on, come on.
Let's click some photographs.
She had brown eyes and a wheatish complexion
She looked like an angel to me
She just passed by me and stole my heart away
She stole my heart away
She had brown eyes and a wheatish complexion
Blooming like spring was her beauty
Her lips couldn't stop smiling
Blooming like spring was her beauty
Her lips couldn't stop smiling
She shook my world
She is an enchanting witch!
She just passed by me and stole my heart away
She stole my heart away
She had brown eyes and a wheatish complexion
She was wearing a bright red dress
She bumped into me at the village fair
She was wearing a bright red dress
She bumped into me at the village fair
The single strand of hair on her forehead
The single strand of hair on her forehead targeted me
She just passed by me and stole my heart away
She stole my heart away
She had brown eyes and a wheatish complexion
Who's there?
Hey.
Son...
Think about it once again.
This is the most precious thing I possess.
Father, the one I am giving it to is the most precious thing of my life.
This necklace has big stones.
Big stones to fulfill big desires.
Yes.
If it is so then go fulfill your desires.
Go, my son.
Hello! Where are you off to?
Where are you going?
I am going inside.
I know that you are going inside.
Is there a tunnel to England from here?
Will I have to ask you to meet her even for two minutes?
You can meet her in the morning.
Go away. You cannot meet her now.
Father, please come here.
Tell him where I am going and what for.
What happened?
Talk to him.
Yes?
Hello.
I seek your sickle's blessings.
Fine.
But who are you to question him?
My son is going to be with his wife.
If you try to stop him, this thing you see here?
It'll be in you neck.
Monkeys like you are sold in the fair for 15 per piece.
We have paid you 1.7 million.
Come on, get lost.
Go, there's the animal shed.
Come with me.
You can hear what are going to talk about.
No, brother.
It is your family matter. You go and talk to her.
And the way your dad threatened me, do you think I should tag along with you?
No.
Okay, then.
What are you doing here?
Well, I...
I thought you were a decent man.
Don't do anything that would make me scream.
Understand?
Now get out.
-Can I sit and talk to you? -No.
Fine.
Well, my mother left me when I was young.
Give me your hand.
This necklace belonged to my mother.
She wanted her daughter-in-law to wear it.
Have you lost your mind?
I am not your mother's daughter-in-law.
But she thinks that you are.
I have spoken to her.
The sooner you get out of this delusion, the happier you will be.
I think the more I stay in this delusion, the happier I will be.
You are really crazy.
What will you tell your father?
Don't worry. I will talk to him.
You don't need to say anything where there is love.
They understand.
Careful.
Where are you going, brother?
Delhi.
Our flight for London is booked for tomorrow.
-Why? -Why what?
You got married.
Come to England with the marriage certificate.
That's fine but if you leave so soon then villagers will get suspicious.
They will start talking.
Okay, so you want us to stay for a few more days?
We can stay, but it will cost you.
No problem. I'll pay.
No, there's no need for that.
We have done so much work.
We deserve a vacation.
We didn't wash utensils.
Wait.
I will carry it.
Don't read into it.
You both make a lovely couple.
I wish you all the best.
Father, go and give two to Boota.
The deal we had made.
All good here.
Stop, now. How long do you want to talk to your dad for?
You just came from there yesterday.
Lakkha, England is very beautiful.
You might be a cheap person, but England is gorgeous.
Give me a hug, brother.
Get lost! He wants a hug.
Okay, now stop this melodrama.
-And pay up the 10,000 pounds you owe us. -Yes.
Which 10,000 pounds?
I don't have anything.
Listen to me.
I just have 3700 rupees.
All tenners.
I removed them from the garlands.
You had promised that you will pay us the balance in England.
- Lakkha, check his bag. - Give it to me.
Where are you hiding the pounds?
We have brought you to England, not Bangladesh.
Let me see how you won't pay us.
Sorry.
Knickers.
More knickers.
More knickers!
Did you bring anything else?
Or have you brought only knickers?
I had told you to talk about the money!
Where is our payment?
I am not sitting at a Ferris wheel counter
that I can give you cash immediately.
Ferris wheel counter?
He is talking about the London Eye.
Why don't you understand?
I need to payment.
If I don't get it then...
Oh God!
Don't worry, Geet.
I am in England now.
I'll earn 10,000 pound like this.
Stop it. Pounds, like this!
They named him Major German Singh Mann.
Like he is the only king of Jaipur.
I don't know.
But you handle this or we are through.
-Understood? -Okay.
You will have to pay.
Don't worry, Lakkha. We will handle it.
We won't do anything. You will, alone.
Whose bag is this?
Tit for tat.
Lakkha!
I wish to eat food cooked by my father
What kind of father feeds you Dosas in the bathroom?
If you want to eat some stuffed flat bread then come outside.
Lakkha?
I wanted to ask, how does one have a bath over here?
There's a shower. Use it.
That I understood.
I know how to bathe.
I wanted to ask, how do you wash it?
Here you don't wash, you wipe it off.
And don't think too much about washing.
Think about earning.
Can I say something?
First, I thought you were dirty from outside.
But now I know that you dirty from inside as well.
Hey!
And get this straight. Don't touch the flour.
I'll make the dough.
You drive well, son.
Are you a citizen?
Of course I am.
But you look like you have just come from India.
I might be from a village,
but I think like an urban.
I found a citizen, gave her 1.7 million.
She came to India to get married.
And I end up here within 15 days.
You can find such girls here?
Like this!
They queue up.
Let me tell you something.
They wear such short hot pants.
And they drink huge bottles of liquor.
Huge bottles?
Yes, huge bottles.
You can increase the length of their shorts,
but the size of the liquor bottle doesn't decrease.
Strange.
Anyway, God bless them.
Do one thing. Give the test and get a license made.
You have got the job.
-Goodbye, uncle. -Goodbye.
Okay, then. Thank you!
Lakkha!
Lakkha, my brother!
Lakkha!
Your brother's first salary.
Hard earned money.
47,520 rupees.
47,520 rupees?
It's just 500 pounds for us.
You still need to pay 9500 pounds to Geet.
German!
Yes?
I have loaded the goods.
It should reach before 6:30am.
At 6:00am!
Here's the paperwork.
Okay.
-Goodbye. -Okay.
My truck races through on GT road
It will stop directly at Pathankot
My truck, my love
I have Hema Malini's photo stuck to the mirror
I look at her when I miss you
Who is he?
Looks like one of ours.
Hey, brother. Can you drop me to the next city?
Come on, get in.
Thanks a lot.
How are you?
Thank you very much, brother.
My name is Amrik.
I am from Ludhiana.
Okay, okay, okay.
Amrik Singh.
Your name suggests that someone in your family
had a desire to go to America.
You are absolutely right.
How do you know that?
Myself Major German Singh Mann.
I just want to go...
My name is Major German Singh Mann.
My father wanted to send me to Germany.
Oh.
Look where we met, in London.
You are right.
Let's have some to celebrate the occasion.
Have you lost your mind?
Don't you know how many responsibilities does a driver have?
You want me to get drunk?
Don't drink if you don't want to.
Why are you getting angry?
"Don't drink if you don't want to."
Who says I don't want to drink?
We will park and drink.
Hey, play some music.
I don't know how the system works.
It's not my truck. You can try.
Okay, I'll play it. It plays from here.
Your trailer has been unplugged.
What is it saying? Shut it.
Here you go.
It's not working.
I'm done. I have to leave by 4:00am.
-Fine then, bottoms up. -Bottoms up.
-There you go, brother. -Here.
-I'm off to sleep. -Okay, brother.
-Okay, good night. -Good night.
Night...
How are you, buddy?
Good. How about you?
What's the time?
6 o'clock.
I was to report at 6:30am. I am half an hour early.
Take your goods off.
Which goods?
Don't you get it?
Get your goods off.
Which goods are you talking about?
Idiot.
Oh... my goodness!
It's already gone.
'Your trailer has been unplugged.'
Brother, you could've come half an hour late,
but you should have at least brought the goods.
Idiot.
Come on, move this truck, get the other.
Get out of here!
Don't show me your face again.
Try to understand.
I don't have any work for you.
Auntie, I will have to leave England.
Have mercy on me.
Fine, son.
Tell me, what work will do you in this boutique?
Oh come on!
I was friends with Kaka, the tailor.
I know how to cut, fold and iron clothes.
Really?
I can place my hand on your hot iron and...
Swear upon it?
You are funny.
Fine, I'll give you a job.
Okay, but you will get only 300 pounds per week.
-How much per month? -1200.
How much in Indian rupees?
You do the math.
I won't be able to send it to India.
Nine times twelve...
This way, it'll take a year to pay Geet.
Okay.
Tell me something. Can you at least converse in English?
Can I? I am great at it.
Go ahead and test me.
-Really? -Yes.
Okay.
If you want say, come here...
To whom?
-Here? -Yes.
Here.
Come here.
Okay.
And if you have to say go there?
-There? There? -Anywhere.
You think that's difficult?
I'll go there and say come here.
Fine, start working.
Hello.
What are you doing here?
You didn't come to collect the installment so I was worried.
I thought I should inquire about your well-being
and give you the installment.
Shut up.
Who gave you the address of this place?
I took it from Lakkha drawer.
Really? Didn't you feel ashamed?
People here don't touch other people's personal belongings.
I wanted to discuss something very important.
What did you want to talk about?
What are you trying to prove?
That you are very handsome and you have a very impressive personality?
Geet, I... I want to take you out for dinner.
Why?
Why should I go for dinner with you?
I love you.
I told you, the sooner you get out of this delusion the better it would be.
But you didn't get it.
No, you don't want to understand.
Wait. Ricky!
Ricky!
Yeah babe, coming.
-Hi, babe. -Hi!
-How are you? -I'm doing well.
Ricky, this is German.
The guy from Punjab?
How are you, bro? All good?
And this is Ricky.
The love of my life.
Ricky and I are getting married next month.
Lakkha will be attending it.
So you can attend it too.
Anyway, you have a lot of experience of handling weddings.
Right?
Now get lost.
Yo, yo!
Have a look!
Look buddy, you are from Lahore, I am from Sangrur.
We are brothers.
Don't you worry.
You are working at 50 pounds a day unnecessarily.
Spend a little and become a permanent resident.
It is expensive.
20,000 pounds is barely anything.
Do this, pay half before the wedding and half after.
Okay?
Hey Brenda.
Meet Geet, my girlfriend.
-Hi! How are you? -Hi.
So, stop worrying okay?
Just take one day off of work and 10,000 pounds. It's simple.
It won't cause a commotion, right?
Commotion?
I am not selling you the London Bridge.
You'll make me a citizen?
You can only become a citizen after you get married.
What else can I do to reassure you?
Lakkha over there, he has arranged 30 marriages so far.
He's a total pro.
Let's go. Come on, let me introduce you.
-Hey bro, what's up? -Good. Good.
Good. Good.
-How are you? -Good. Good.
Serve me a drink, bro.
It's stiff!
I'll have a small one.
Alright, Ali. This is Brenda.
Brenda, Ali.
Hi.
I have explained everything to him.
He agreed.
He's saying Ali is ready.
-And you? -I'm good to go.
Come on!
Come here, then.
-Stand next to her. -You two are set.
-Cheers, guys. -Cheers!
I'm inspector Brenda Singh from UK Immigration.
You're under arrest, Sir.
What are the charges?
For faking a marriage with a Punjabi boy,
to help him get a citizenship.
But last night you told me how you perform fake marriages.
Can I call my lawyer?
You will have to answer me.
You mean to say that you got married but it wasn't fake?
Neither meet nor try to meet Geet.
Or else you'll be in deep shit.
Look Ms. Geet Kahlon.
I know you went to India on 7th May with Lakhwinder Johal.
We will find that Punjabi boy in a few days.
So it would be better if you tell us the truth.
Yes, I got married.
But mine was a genuine marriage.
Oh, so this is a genuine marriage?
Call your husband,
ask him to come here right away.
What happened? Can't get through?
I know you got married for money.
And you two don't stay together.
I told you...
Cool! Cool! Cool, Ms. Kahlon!
Mine wasn't a fake marriage.
My marriage is genuine.
My husband has gone to Vegas with his friends.
Then why didn't you go with him?
I don't like Vegas and gambling.
When is he coming back?
Two weeks.
Okay, fair enough.
You will come here with your husband after two weeks.
We will interview both of you.
And this will be a tough time for you.
If you are unable to prove that your marriage is genuine,
then you'll get 5 years' imprisonment and a fine of 100,000 pounds.
Is that good for you, Ms. Geet Kahlon?
-Yeah. -Ricky!
Lakkha and Geet have been arrested by the immigration department.
Ricky!
Where are you going?
My cousin in Manchester met with an accident.
Terry.
But I need you.
Geet, try to understand.
My cousin needs me too.
He's all alone.
What will I do?
Ricky!
Ricky! Now you are more concerned about your cousin!
Why don't you understand?
Immigration officers know that German and I performed a fake marriage.
What?
Look Geet... I love you, darling.
I'll appoint the best lawyer in the city for you.
But I will have to leave right away.
Please.
But Ricky, I did all this for both of us.
I know, darling. I know.
I will be back in a few days.
Please, try to understand.
See you soon.
Come on!
The number you have called is switched off.
Excuse me, have you seen this guy?
No, sorry.
For two bucks...
Bro, have you seen this boy anywhere?
-Yes, I have seen him. -Really? Where?
He used to work for us.
He didn't show up.
He worked for 15 days and then he didn't show up.
Where did he go? Any forwarding address or anything?
No, I don't know where he went.
No woman is so tall.
I think our guy made a mistake.
I will have to do something about it.
You will like it.
Excuse me.
Forget it, it's not important.
You will come here with your husband after two weeks.
We will interview both of you.
And this will be a tough time for you.
If you are unable to prove that your marriage is genuine,
then you'll get 5 years' imprisonment and a fine of 100,000 pounds.
Hi, Miss Bensen! How are you?
I am good, thank you, indeed.
How are you?
I am very well.
Is the dress ready yet?
-You're gonna love it! Come in. -Really?
Hey! German!
She is Mayor Adam Bell's daughter.
The white gown I had asked you to iron,
is it ready?
-It is ready. -Get it.
You're gonna look so beautiful in it.
Thank you.
-Oh wow. -Thank you.
Here you go.
-Thank you. -Would you like a trial?
Of course, I would love to try it on.
Oh.
I can't believe I've finally got it in my hands!
-This way, please. -Thank you.
I am so sorry.
This must be a wrong one.
Just give me a moment.
What the hell, Major! What happened?
The gown was fine until yesterday.
What did you do?
It was very big, aunt.
It would have trailed behind her like a carriage behind horses.
It is a wedding dress.
If she tripped on it
who would be held responsible?
Major.
So I cut it short.
Now she can dance all she wants in it.
It's okay, aunt.
Excuse me.
Stay here.
She is getting married. Soon she will have children of her own.
I made this dress for her daughter.
-For kids. -What?
Get up, aunt! It's okay.
Get up, aunt! Don't worry. Get up, aunt!
This is ridiculous.
Yeah, dad.
All good?
How're aunty and uncle?
I'm not home right now,
I'd come out for some work.
Is everything okay at home?
Not too much trouble, I hope.
Why are you following me?
When did I follow you?
You have a habit of lying.
Look, you paid me. You got the citizenship.
Now go and mind your own business.
I take this bus to work every day.
At the same time.
I am not following you.
Listen to me.
You're in England.
Here, you need money to fulfill your dreams.
I wanted to settle in Liverpool after getting married to Ricky.
That's why I did all this.
But I didn't ask for any clarifications.
I don't complain either.
Why are you troubling me?
No, I... just... if there are any grudges then we can talk.
You have grudges and complain if you have ego or arrogance.
And there is no place for these things in love.
But if you still think I am coming in your way then forgive me.
I won't do it again.
German!
Shit!
I have searched the whole city looking for you.
-Come with me. -Where?
The immigration department is suspicious. We need to give an interview.
I have to report to work at 11:00am. I am not free.
This guy just doesn't get it.
Have you lost your mind?
You are worried about your work?
If the immigration department find any proof
they'll deport you, damn it!
You don't even understand English!
They will send you back to India.
I don't need your help. I'll handle it on my own.
Have you gone crazy?
You are in deep shit.
I am not.
It's not like they are about to declare my high school results,
that I would be in deep shit. Understood?
You are in deep shit because the immigration department caught you.
Now you'll be imprisoned.
I will handle my situation.
Understood?
Listen...
I think we both need each other.
We could handle this together.
"Together."
And at times, it's "Get lost."
You are just as unpredictable as the weather.
Okay, I could think about it if you apologize.
Fine, I am sorry.
That was so fake.
Say it like you mean it.
I'm sorry for everything that I did.
I know a little English.
But I want you to apologize for everything... in Punjabi.
That too in one breath.
I have troubled you a lot.
I apologize for that.
Oh God!
No day has ever been as beautiful as today.
Okay, so what can I do for you?
Come on, let's go and prepare for the interview.
Let's go.
Groceries and bills have been taken care of
All we need to take care of is the rent
It's close, dear
It's your beloved drink
Tell me, what do I need to do?
Our interview will take place next to next Monday.
We will stay together in my apartment for the next two weeks,
so that we can get to know each other better.
The same apartment which has a sea view?
It's not a sea, it's a river.
Thames river.
We will stay together?
Yes, we will stay together.
I'll also show you the London Bridge.
I'll take you...
A beautiful tall maiden
Her eyes are like a deep ocean
She is beauty
God has taken His own sweet time to make her
Even the sun is awestruck
When it is blessed with your presence
Water feels blessed
When you take it to your lips
Water feels blessed
When you take it to your lips
There is no one like you
Even the angels are jealous of you
Even the best damsels cannot be compared to you
Your cheeks are milky
And soft like a fresh cotton bud
Water feels blessed
When you take it to your lips
Water feels blessed
When you take it to your lips
When you smile, A million flowers blossom
My fair lady, you don't need any make up
Even the snake wants to be the kohl
That you put on your eyes
Water feels blessed
When you take it to your lips
Water feels blessed
When you take it to your lips
Hello!
Miss Geet Kahlon.
This is Brenda Singh from UK Immigration.
When you and your husband come to us for interview,
please bring your mom and dad along.
Is that clear?
Mom, dad!
We have to take my parents along.
Mom...
You got married?
But didn't you go to Scotland to attend your friend's wedding?
How did you end up getting married?
I had gone to Scotland, mom.
That's where I had met him.
We fell in love.
So, we got married.
This guy?
If you had to get married without telling us
you could have found someone better.
Ricky was much better than him.
Listen sonny,
don't have any doubts.
I am English at heart.
England is as much mine as it is yours.
You didn't think it was important to even call and inform your mother?
Mummy, everything happened in such a hurry,
that I didn't get any time to think.
Geet, it's your problem.
Whenever you shop in a hurry, you buy the wrong things.
Mummy, where's dad?
I called him at the truck station.
He is coming. He is on his way.
He'll be here soon.
Dad!
Shit! Damn... I mean, oh my goodness!
-It's boss! -Geet!
Dad!
Daddy!
Geet, do you know how upset I was with you?
Yes, dad.
But I am pleased that you got married to a Sardar.
-Really, dad? -Okay, I forgive you.
Thank you! I love you!
Dad, this is your son-in-law.
Major German Singh Mann.
But why is he looking the other way?
German, dad's here.
Why are you blushing like a newly wed bride?
Show me your face.
Okay, I forgive both of you.
Do you really forgive us?
Yes.
Oh. German, you?
So, you got married to my daughter and became a citizen?
Yes.
So you gave her 1.7 million rupees
and she went to Punjab to get married to you.
Satwant, this boy gave her 1.7 million rupees
and she went to Punjab to get married to him!
Don't you have any shame?
You have cheated us.
Sorry, dad.
I needed the money.
You needed money?
I have always given double the pocket money you asked for.
Tell me, did I ever stop you from doing anything?
And whom did you get married to?
I have never seen anyone as overconfident and idiotic as him.
He was to deliver a container worth 20,000 pounds, filled with fruits
he parked on the road and went to sleep.
He was that sleepy.
Get out of here!
Don't show me your face!
-Dad... Dad, I... -"Dad" what?
Get out of here.
I feel ashamed that my daughter got married for money.
That too a fake marriage.
Look, you can throw me out of your house if you want.
But please let your daughter stay here.
Where will this poor soul go in this condition?
What is wrong with Geet?
You are going to be a grandma.
What?
Look, no matter what you say,
my daughter won't leave this house.
Okay then, goodbye.
Please forgive me, if possible.
-Dad... -German!
Yes, daddy?
If I see you even anywhere close to my house, I'll shoot you.
Go!
Mummy!
German!
Wait.
Listen, our daughter is pregnant.
What will tell everyone?
Think about that as well.
Go to hell, I don't care a damn.
Take it in, kid.
Bad choice.
Mummy, what you said about sons-in-law, very good.
Please make some rice and curry. I am hungry.
Okay, I'll make it.
-Mom... -Yes?
You know what?
Geet is sleeping on the floor and German is sleeping on the bed.
What are you saying?
You don't believe me? Come and see it for yourself.
What? Let's go.
Mummy? Good morning, mummy.
Come in.
Good morning, son.
She is still sleeping?
No, mummy. She is very fortunate.
She sleeps soundly.
What happened? Is everything alright?
It's nothing, son.
I just came to tell you to get ready as I am preparing your breakfast.
Okay.
Stay within your limit!
No need to get too personal.
How many times have I told you that?
Don't make me angry.
If your mother had seen you sleeping on the sofa,
then you would have been wearing prison clothes.
Go and have a bath.
Daddy...
I know you are upset with me.
But let me tell you the truth.
German is a very nice guy.
Tara writes from London!
Tell me what's happening in the village, my friend!
What is this?
A boomerang, in England?
No, it's not that.
It is a toy.
You won't find anyone smarter than him.
Give him a chance.
Where did you get this hooligan from?
Does he even know how to live in society?
Crazy man!
Throw him out of our house!
What happened? What happened here?
How did this happen?
Sorry, daddy. Sorry.
He dares to call me daddy!
Mother, you should at least keep some wipes handy at home.
Hey...
What happened to her suddenly?
What happened?
-What happened? -What happened?
-It happened last night as well. -Tell me what's wrong!
It happened last night as well. Get up.
-It's okay. Let's go in. -Mummy.
Let's go inside.
-Mummy! -Hey... at least tell me what's wrong.
It's okay. It's okay.
Let's go inside. You'll be fine.
-Are you alright? -Get off!
Wow!
I thought you were all talk.
But you can think on your feet as well.
Henceforth, you won't cause any trouble in front of dad.
Do you understand?
Here's a pen and a notebook.
And start preparing.
Preparing for what?
For the interview.
This wasn't the deal.
It will cost you 500 pounds.
Fine. Now leave.
What fine. Pay up first, then the job will be done.
My account balance is zero at the moment.
And I won't ask dad for money.
I'll remove some from his cupboard in the evening and pay you.
Now leave.
To take stolen money is as bad as stealing.
German!
Yes?
Give me your slippers.
What is it?
There!
What? What did I do?
Okay, your size is eight and a half and mine is seven and a half.
My size is eight and one quarter.
Stop your nonsense.
I use size eight. I am telling you.
I told you to shut up.
Now tell me, on which side of the bed do you sleep?
I sleep on the right.
I don't sleep on a bed.
I sleep on a cot.
With the head on the other side.
And my cot is right under the fan.
I fear heights the most.
You?
I didn't even prepare so much for my high school exams.
If I had, I would have stood first.
I fear pesticides and crop dealers.
Do you know how to answer any of the questions?
You keep lying.
Mitha?
What's wrong with him?
I think he got bullied by the white kids again.
People are really racist here.
Mitha is very innocent.
He gets scared easily.
Innocent?
He comes after me like bully.
Hurry up, son. Your beans are ready.
Mom, I don't want to eat beans today.
You make beans every day.
What else do you want to eat, tell me.
Fried chips.
Idiot.
Mummy, give him some buttermilk.
It will refresh him.
It will scare the Englishmen away.
And fried food isn't healthy.
Give me some stuffed bread.
I will eat it.
Okay, son. I'll make some right away.
Mom, I'm going to gym.
Gym?
Dear, you just had a contraction yesterday.
You should stop going to gym.
-Nothing had happened to me, mom. -What?
Nothing happened,
because I was with her.
I was there.
Anything could have happened.
Yes, son.
This problem can take place anytime.
Do one thing, take German with you to the gym.
Come on, mom!
I said, take him with you.
-It will cost you 1000 pound. -Get lost!
Come if you want or don't.
What happened, son?
What is she saying?
Nothing, mother. She asked me to hurry up.
Pack up bread and give it to me.
Okay.
She has found a nice husband.
He is so innocent.
Stop already.
You'll erode your bones with so much running.
Plastic dolls like you pose like this at clothes store.
Come on.
Do you want to gain weight or lose weight?
If you want to gain weight, then have bananas and cream.
If you want to lose weight, then have lemonade with honey.
In lukewarm water.
Let me exercise.
Go and mind your own business.
Here's your 1000 pounds. Take it.
Mummy has done some shopping for you as well.
Here's the bag.
I think she spent a lot of money on me.
Well, it's all about how much you love your dear ones.
Earlier you looked only like a thug.
In these photos, you look like a murderer as well.
Hey!
Give them back.
Give me a minute.
-German... -What's this?
Nothing. Go and mind your own business.
Tell me.
They say sorrow decreases when you share it.
Last year when Ricky and I were coming out of a club,
we were cornered by a few foreigners.
We don't want any trouble!
Give me everything you have.
-Give me everything. -Take my chain.
Where's your wallet?
Wallet.
Don't touch her, please.
-Hey guys, listen, please. -Mobile, come on.
Don't touch her, please.
Give me your wallet.
Listen, please!
What did you so? We'll kill you for that!
Let's go, let's run!
-Yeah, get out of here. -You'd better run!
The next morning someone sent us these photographs.
And started blackmailing us.
Ricky gave all his savings to the blackmailer.
I sold my car.
And I started stealing money from dad's cupboard.
We have given 70,000 pounds to the blackmailers so far.
70,000 pounds.
German, where are you going?
German!
There's the dead body of the man you stabbed.
Brother, my name is Amrik.
I am from Ludhiana.
Give me everything. Everything. - I will.
Don't push him!
Don't hit him with this!
Don't hit his head with a brick!
Damn...
You have lost your mind!
Don't get me arrested!
Thank you very much for intervening,
or else she would have killed me.
Ricky gave Anthony and me 500 pounds
to act the whole thing out.
There was someone hiding and clicking pictures of all this.
And the blood and the dagger were both fake.
I know how much it hurts,
when someone close to you betrays you like this.
Yes, I know Ricky cheated me.
This doesn't mean that know you stand a chance.
You have four days.
Give the interview and get out of my life.
German, who else do you have in your family?
Everyone, except a mother.
And I found one here.
Yeah, I'm open! Over here!
You want the ball? Take it.
What the hell!
Goal!
Yeah!
Yeah, come on!
Pass that ball!
Why are you feeling scared, Mitha?
They're just lanky boys. Beat them up.
I can't hit anyone.
I'm not that strong.
If you cannot hit them, you can at least be brave enough to face them?
Now if they hit you, don't be scared.
You will see that they will get scared and run away.
No, I can't do it.
German, he can't do it.
He has to gather the courage, mother.
Today they are asking him to leave the ground.
Next, they will ask to leave his house.
And then they will ask you to leave this country.
-Go and face them, my boy. -No.
You have to get rid of your fear.
Otherwise, it'll kill you slowly.
Go on.
Let's play.
Mitha stays quite happy these days.
All thanks to German.
By the way, thank you.
For helping Mitha.
I know.
But that doesn't mean that now I stand a chance.
Dad's calling.
Hello?
Geet...
Ricky was good.
But German is very good.
Geet... Ricky was good.
But German is very good.
This necklace belonged to my mother.
She wanted her daughter-in-law to wear it.
Geet!
Where are you?
Come here. I want to talk to you.
Come here.
Sit down.
Look at this.
Isn't this teddy very cute?
Yes, mom.
And look at this one.
Look at these. A few pictures of babies.
Isn't this baby so cute?
Look. This one is so cute.
Geet...
Every parent has a dream...
of getting their children married in a grand way.
My dream wasn't fulfilled.
But now I won't listen to you.
Now I'll decorate this whole house to welcome my grandchild.
Get ready quickly.
Your papa wants to go the Gurudwara.
Get ready quickly.
I'll wait for you.
Listen, your father seems to be in a good mood today.
I suggest you should talk to him.
Khalsa belongs to Lord. Victory belongs to Lord.
Babaji, my daughter is pregnant.
We want you to pray for her good health.
I lied to myself.
I lied to mom and dad.
Lord...
how can I lie to you?
Geet!
What happened, dear?
Geet! Why are you crying?
Tell me what's wrong with you!
Geet!
Why are you crying, dear? Tell me.
Geet! Are you feeling alright?
I don't know why she is crying.
Tell us.
Why are you crying?
Yes?
No, dad.
I am not alright.
The truth is that the immigration department
know that German and my marriage is a fake one.
They have asked us to come to their office on Monday.
And you and mummy also have to be there.
We lied that I am pregnant so that we could stay here.
I'm sorry dad!
You could have told us the truth.
How much are you going to lie to us?
I don't know if I can even believe you.
Look at your child, Satwant Kaur.
You two should feel ashamed for playing with our emotions.
I can never forgive the two of you.
I'm sorry, dad!
Get out of here!
Satwant, ask them to leave or you will see me dead.
Dad, please. Forgive them.
You stay out of this, Mitha!
-You two should leave. Go away. -Mummy!
Every moment feels like a decade
My body is alive but my heart is slowly dying
I cannot find any support
Even God has refused to help us, my dear
You built our own little world with love
Then you broke our trust, this isn't right, my dear
It's not right
This isn't right, my dear
It's not right
This isn't right, my dear
Yes, this isn't fair
Why dream when I know my dreams will break
All the hopes I had will shatter
Why dream when I know my dreams will break
All the hopes I had will shatter
We were only meant to be together for so long
You squeezed the life out of me, this isn't right, my dear
You squeezed life out of me, this isn't right, my dear
It's not right
This isn't right, my dear
It's not right
This isn't right, my dear
Yes, this isn't fair
My eyes have forgotten how to sleep, my love
Now even the fans blow out hot air
My eyes have forgotten how to sleep, my love
Now even the fans blow out hot air
I keep treasuring your memories
After helping...
After helping the kite of my life soar
If you let go of the thread then it isn't right, my dear
It's not right
This isn't right, my dear
It's not right
This isn't right, my dear
Yes, this isn't fair
It's not Geet's fault.
She did all this to save her life and your honor.
It was my fault.
I lied to you and said that Geet was pregnant.
Whether or not you forgive me,
you should forgive Geet.
Because when kids from good families end up in prison
then your reputation gets soiled.
Geet, you don't like bitter gourd, right?
And what's that thing you eat with bread? It looks like peanuts.
What is it called?
Peanut butter?
Yes.
That.
And what do you eat with milk?
What's that called?
Corn flakes.
Please forgive me, Geet.
I always am caught when I lie, since childhood.
You got me the citizenship.
I couldn't do anything right.
No.
It is my fault.
I shouldn't have met Lakkha.
I was never worthy of you.
And I never will be.
I will be arrested tomorrow.
You will be deported to Punjab.
That means we will never meet again.
Forgive me for all my stupidity, for all the mistakes I have made.
If you ever come to India again, do pay us a visit.
There are five questions on this sheet.
Answer them and give it back to me.
Then I will ask you about each other's life.
You'll have to get 8 answers right, or you are done.
Okay, let's start the interview.
Your parents didn't come, Geet?
They won't be coming.
I knew that this is a sham marriage.
You are fooling the UK Government.
I will make sure both of you get punished.
So, let's confess.
Geet had come to Punjab in May to marry me.
I had given her 1.7 million rupees.
We got married and came to India.
And we no longer stay together.
This is what you think, Brenda.
But we stay together at her parents' house.
She is my real wife.
Our marriage is not a sham.
Dad!
Dad, you're here!
-Excuse me. -Mom!
Mother, thank you for not letting your anger get the better of you.
Be careful, dear. This is the question of your life.
Okay, mom.
Let's go.
So, let's start the interview.
Good morning, madam.
Myself Major German Singh Mann.
I just want to go to England for 10-15 days as a tourist.
What?
Nothing. You start the interview.
Geet, what's German's qualification?
High school.
He's gone to high school.
What's his biggest weakness?
German's biggest weakness...
is that he cannot lie.
He's a very bad liar.
His biggest dream?
His biggest dream...
has always been to get out of India.
Like to UK or Germany.
Something like that.
What's German's shoe size?
His shoe size?
Eight and a half.
German, you have mentioned it as eight and a quarter.
Ms. Brenda, let me explain.
My shoe size is eight and a quarter.
I stuff these to make them fit.
You can put anything.
A rag, a rolled up sock?
So it is eight and a half that way.
Wrong answer.
I told you it is eight and a quarter.
When did you say it?
Geet, what was the name of German's last girlfriend?
I... I don't know.
Strange, you don't know?
You are the first and the last girl in his life.
German, now I will ask you five questions.
You have to answer them all right,
otherwise you are gone.
Okay.
Ready?
Yes.
Which game does Geet like the most?
Basketball.
Ask me why.
Okay, I'll tell you.
Tall girls like her either play basketball or clean ceiling fans.
Geet had a boyfriend. What is his name?
I know everything about him.
What was his name? Ricky Javinder.
He stays in Manchester with his cousin.
His village is close to Jalandhar, Zandu Singha.
He is into quite a few illegal activities.
He cheats rich girls.
Cheap tricks like that.
There isn't--
Enough.
Next question.
At the moment, what's the balance in Geet's bank account?
Zilch.
Nothing.
You must be wondering that I gave her 1.7 million rupees,
so she must have a hefty bank balance.
Zero.
Eighty-five times zero is also zero.
Nothing. I mean she doesn't have any money.
Empty account.
Next question.
What is Geet's body weight?
What is she saying?
She's asking what's my body weight.
Tell her.
Shameless. She is asking you.
-One load full. -What?
60 Kilos.
Last question.
What's the most precious thing in Geet's life?
What is she saying?
She is asking what's the most precious thing?
My mother's necklace.
Whom was she referring to?
Me.
I told her about myself.
I'd written the same thing.
Mrs. Satwant Kaur, what's German's mother's age?
Well... German was quite young when his mother passed away.
Mr. Hardayal Kahlon.
What was the first job German took up in UK?
German's first job in UK, he was a truck driver.
Congratulations.
We believe this is a genuine marriage.
You may go now.
Okay.
Goodbye.
Brenda, just ask us whatever you want now.
Or else she would keep troubling us.
She is through.
No daddy, she might come back and ask questions again.
Let's end this once and for all. You ask whatever you want.
She is through. Goodbye.
Okay, goodbye.
Wait here, the both of you.
We'll get the car.
Let's go, Mitha.
You are still getting people married?
Strange!
Will I only keep getting others married all my life?
Won't I get married and settle down?
She's my wife.
I mean my better half, Pari.
What are you doing here?
I've come to the Immigration Office for an interview.
I can't believe you, you rascal!
-He's kidding. -I need to become a citizen.
Wait, you scoundrel.
-Best friend! -You kept me worrying for six months!
-He is very emotional! -Who do you think you are!
Brother, you can say whatever you want.
You're a citizen now.
You don't know about the sorrows of soldiers like us in England.
Let's go, Pari.
We shouldn't waste time talking to rustic people.
Listen...
shall we?
Your tresses are like a mesmerizing snake
Your reflection is imprinted In the waters of my village
Your reflection
A glass bottle
A glass bottle filled with perfume
Talk about lifetime of togetherness, Don't be hasty